the blood runs from my face

the blood runs from my face, i say, i say as i unmake my bed

the blood runs from my face, i say, i say as i undo my head

the blood runs from my face, i say, i say as i jump from the ledge

the blood runs from my face, i say, i say as i move closer to the end.

-bnf. tuesday/may 5th/2012.

red velvet box.

A woman inside'a red velvet box in her mind...

With a sickle, a handgun, an idea, a loss.

She is beaten and abused, manipulated and used...

(Misunderstood by complexity of emotion and

now she'll abuse.)

She'll blot out her daughter, her husband, the dog.

Her coworker, her husband, her mother, her Gods,

the kept lawn, the green grass, the Tupperware snobs,

the stale mixers, the falsehoods, the two car garage...

Oh the misery within the tangled human vine,

She will stay inside a red velvet box in her mind...

With a sickle, a handgun, an idea, in due time..

The burden will be lifted and freedom she will find:

just as, just when..

Her wrists spill crimson wine..

detroit soapbox. 5-12-12.

Ah so on the verge we are here, yet what homage we pay to a past that so abused us.

So and so..

That old so and SO! So and so, you say? Who is so and so? So and so is INDUSTRY! So and so rose up from a hard clay earth of difficulty and little fruit to bare and sought solace within the minds of an innovative people who were quick to learn, and took them, post haste.. deep.. into the bowels of injustice.

Bodies big, bodies small, bodies young, bodies old, bodies black, bodies freckled, bodies pale, bodies yellow, bodies red, bodies distorted, bodies disfigured, bodies beautiful, bodies clothed, bodies naked, bodies healthy, bodies sick, bodies young, bodies old, bodies alive... bodies dead... all that came... are all that went, but not all that come back, are not all who were taken, into the stomach, digested and eaten, by industry starving, for a new cog...

in a machine head. cold and invasive, distant and hurtful, cutthroat and barren, ruthless and baiting..

baiting a people who are eager,

eager and waiting;

for opportunity and knowledge;

knowledge for wisdom.

in love in humidity

you know you say do not want me
wide black eyes
the center of my body
empty there


my card is guilt, manipulation..
awh see, i know you.
awh see, i know you.

you know you say.. you say you don't couldn't want
you say you don't couldn't want
couldn't want

all of it you couldn't want

rolling thunder black eyed bride stinging needle fading pride empty bucket chicken wing broken bow and sudden grin lowly bow in parlor trow the midnight bell is ringing in a nonsensical violent trap of minds eye over thinking

falling tower ceiling mat the sickly sound of falling back into red velvet in a haze the prickly feeling against your skin. the bananas peel the apples juice the round babe green and sinking the pie should crumble healing stacks of omens good and giving.

in a bathroom

Into the mirror she spoke through thin rouged lips and a veil of shower steam:

"Intermingling with the stars at night was my pale disposition and a worse affliction for I was in love with someone who did not love me. All the while I'm sitting and waiting wondering why this has to be the very core of my being now, after all this time. All this time spent wondering if I will ever feel anything more than just plain sad, now it is just plain bittersweet hurt and disgust for myself, and this disposition. My outlook has tarnished and my ashes are piling, stories high up and up they go into a sky I am unsure of. Into a sky I do not trust and do not know. Uncertainty you unduly rule me now and forever sore.

Oh, this crummy view. This yellow and rotted place how you own me. You own me into the day following night and over and over again. You rule me into the pits of disdain. You rule me into the false hope of certain happiness, of certain pleasure away from pain."